Sunday, January 13, 2008


After a very snowy December in the northeast, we had such lovely weather this week. Kiddos and I went out every day to play in our diminishing snowpack. First there was almost 3 feet, then 2 feet, then one foot, then big holes in the snow where lawn showed through. Rain on Friday took care of most of the rest. The base of the giant snowperson in the backyard is a frozen hummock but most of the yard is clear.

Got to poop-scoop (oh yeah, I live for that chore!) and fill the birdfeeder, and gather up the big branches that fell from our nearly-dead sugar maple. That tree was supposed to come down before Thanksgiving, but the tree guy was delayed by weather and then the snow came and stayed. At least we can see down the road when we turn out!

but then there is tonight...we could get another 14 inches (that's what we got in the last storm about 2 or 3 weeks ago), and another storm coming in for Friday. A week bracketed by snow. Kewl.

I choose to live in New England because I do like the weather. Oh, I complain about the heat in August, and that darned polar express that brings us sub-zero temps in February, but the rest of it, yeah, I like it. And although I'm so wayyy not a kid anymore, the thought of snowstorms excites me, every bit as much as thunderstorms do. I love to look up from my back porch and see the flakes just flying down at me, see the beauty and pristine whiteness...the Ansel Adams portrait of the outdoors. And I like how luminescent the backyard is even when it's deep dark midnight...the snow just reflects all the light and it doesn't seem so densely dark. Snow-glow or somesuch.

So, I'll be waking up early and looking outside! The dog will be excited in his puppy way, the boys will love it, although as homeschoolers, there are no snow days for us per se. Snow play, oh yes!

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Yule never guess..

...just how fast one must be to grab a photo op with this bunch! I think they sat like this for about 45 seconds...all subsequent photo's show someone's butt, tongue hanging out, or ghoulish faces!
The kids decorated the Yule tree this year, and Rob (11) put it up! Oh, yeah, it's fake, because I'm still allergic to the real ones. Been trying every year since 1978 and still they make me sneeze. sigh. Anyway, Rob studied this process last year, and then this year felt he was "ready now" to take over this odious task for me. I put on the 8 strings of blue and white lights, and directed the two older boys on which boxes of decorations came down from the attic. All in all it was a lovely tree.
One thing you cannot see is the elf collection. When Robbie came home to us at age 5, his kindergarten teacher made kid-elf ornaments...elf body, with kids photo face. This has hung on our tree these last 7 Yuletides, and this year, KC (3) decided he needed to have an elf too! So I traced, colored, photo'd, printed and laminated a KC elf. "but what about Lissa? What about Chet?" the two elves asked, so they too were "elfed". It was so cute how the brothers decided that all the kids needed elves on the tree in their images!
Anyway, sharing this has put me in a good mood. We had just the best Yule, it was fun and family and cuddles and love and Lee's delicious cinnamon buns hot from the oven (she makes them up Christmas eve so they are ready to pop into the oven Christmas morn).
Well, the kitten is driving me nuts, so I must end tonights ramble. But not without a mega "YAHOOOOWAHOOOO" as the Patriots have just defeated the Jax. Jag's 31 to 20 !! Woo hoo!
Next stop, Payton Manning and the Colts!

Friday, January 11, 2008

Firstly, 2008

....has been good. But I've been suffering what, 100 years ago would have been labeled "melancholia"...nothing so horrible has happened but I am just blue. I had a bad November, really in a deep funk, but I lay that to not sleeping through the night for 11 months. The Friday before Christmas, Elisabeth slept through the night...and has every night since. I amend that. She tried to wake up, but instead of giving her a bottle, I just re-covered her, and she went back to sleep...I'd been "enabling" her to wake up by giving her bottles on "mommy auto-pilot"!! Yikes, if I'd figured that out in August, would my Autumn have been different? Who knows. Anyway, I'm funked out. Tired of being in one, tired of my messy house, tired of ...being overweight and not doing anything about it. I guess that's the major issue, isn't it? I'm fat, and I hate it, and I keep giving up, and I don't give up when it's for someone else, just me. I get tired of "dieting" or don't have time to make lunch or dinner and it's takeout, or hell, I might just be lazy. I admit it, I LOVE food. But when I can mow through an entire bag of Lay's Potato chips all by my lonesome, it's time for a time out for momma.

So....tomorrow I'm off to weightwatchers. Yes, again. but it worked for me many moons ago, when I was just a fey youngling. Kept my weight off for 8 years, and then adopted our first kiddo, and he has/had issues that kept me eating for comfort for the past 20 years. Oh, it's so hard living with someone with Aspergers (high functioning autism)...looking back I wonder how I ever did it, sometimes. He's such a hard case even now, and likely won't ever live without us, as he forgets to eat, or bathe or leave his room if we' re not diligent. But I digress...tomorrow I will go stand on that scale and find out that I weigh nearly 200 pounds. Ugh! I'm only 5'1" so when I wear my blue sweatpants and sweatshirt, I look like that girl on Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. You know, the Blueberry girl? ya, me.

I am not comfortable in my skin, I have no energy. No, that's not true. I do have energy but I run through it quickly. I homeschool my 11 yo, and kinda school the 3 yo, and care for the fully walking 12 month old, and nag the 22 yo...laundry for 6 people (including the baby diapers), meals, and a big old house to maintain. I have gleefully traded my job of 25 years for a full time job here at h ome, and most of the time don't regret it. There are days when I just want to fall into a vat of ice cream and die there, but for the most part, it's great to be home and puttering...oh yeah, right, puttering! I'm very directed with the tasks I do, but phew, by days end I'm so weary.

I think I'm also battling the age demon. Did I mention that I'm heading for my 49th birthday in a few weeks. Three or 4 weeks I guess. Egads!! that means I'm almost 50!!! FIFTY??!! What the? how? Inside, I'm a tired 18 year old. Maybe 25 year old. I forget for vast periods of time that I'm 48. I'm one of those unhip and uncool. I don't have a cell phone, and it took me 3 days to figure out how to wire the two hd tv's we got last summer. I do have a cordless phone and a computer, however!

Well, it's time for me to quit my bellyaching, suck it up, and get on with my life, and stop dwelling in Funk town, where the skies are perpetually grey and it smells like old fart. Yeah, I'm outta there.

Gotta's time for my nap....